Wednesday, February 23, 2005

The Peak of Human Performance

So it turns out that a bunch of baseball players are doped up on steroids. Big deal. In my opinion, every drug ought to be legal in professional sports. It's time to get our money's worth from these grotesquely overpaid genetic misfits. Baseball is boring enough; without steroids there wouldn't be as many home runs which, Jumbotron antics aside, are pretty much the sole source of excitement in that dismal "sport".

What's more, just think about how much better the other sports would be. Football players loaded on PCP would be far more entertaining. Junior leaguers jacked up with speed would make for a better hockey season than the striking whiners could ever provide, and golfers on crank might actually find an amusing use for their clubs.

2 comments:

Grafxgurl said...

lol... but its so much more fun when they make mistakes and then we get to laugh at them and then they make even more mistakes then we get more and more entertainment out of them..
if they did so well then it wouldnt be so much fun!!!

( just wandered in on a whim.(hi).found this funny.. lol)

Moon Goddess said...

You present a very origonal and frighteningly convincing argument... I hate sports and would really rather just put all the little athelete people on an island and wait to see if they'd eat eachother before figuring out if the vegitation tastes good.