Saturday, February 12, 2005

Pro Forma

Japanese dramas, like all formuliac television, relies on certain time honored precepts. Although when first encountered they appear somewhat unusual, eventually you become accustomed to them to the point where you expect them in domestic shows. Anyway, a short list is included below:

1. No Japanese woman is capable of running more than 100 feet in any direction before falling down. Why this is I'm not really sure. Of course, in many of these shows the female leads have fatal but visually undetectable diseases.

2. If you're a highschool student then either
A - Your parents live overseas
B - Your parents are dead
C - One of your parents died. The other has remarried and you now have a devistatingly attractive stepsibbling.

3. The female lead must be slapped at least once, and possibly many more times. It seems to still be en vogue to resort to a little light abuse in order to keep your woman in line. It really is somewhat curious how common slapping is in dramas. Watch for it, you'll see it every time.

4. Despite the fact that Japan is an exceedingly homogenious society based, in large part, on communal precepts, the surest way to achieve ultimate success is to buck the system. Yeah, things will be rough at first, but then you'll find the one teacher/boss/client/boyfried/girlfriend who understands you and then it's just a few short episodes to becoming Prime Minister.

5. Ryoko Hirosue is gorgeous, especially with red hair*.

*= Of course, it's almost a given that Asian women with red hair are going to be irressitable.

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